The Secret Diary of Stephen Harper: Moi? International Money Czar?

Monday, April 6, 2009

Moi? International Money Czar?

There was a lot of goofing around at the G-20, and I kind of felt shut out from the cooler kids, but they're just jealous because we have a whole pile of the world's wealth - oil, water, minerals, forests, plus a kick-butt banking system second to none.

Barry even had the Queen buzz me on my BlackBerry to try and get me to miss the photo op. What a card.

Anyhoo, there was a lot of buzzing about international reform and regulation, and it was proposed, only half in jest, that I should leave this job and become despot of some new super IMF, headquartered in Iceland or somewhere.

Get real, I said. Who will take care of Canada while I am away? Count Ignatula? The coalition? You guys will carve up our dear country like a pumpkin.

Talk Tough Like Mike

•“Look, this is America and you have to decide what kind of country you want. This is your country as much as it is mine.” - 2004
*"Look, if I lose, I'll just move back to Massachusetts." - to the Harvard Crimson newspaper - 2006
*“If you mess with me, I’ll mess with you until I’m done.”
• "You're looking at someone who turned down the chance to become Prime Minister of Canada, and I did so, in part, because I felt it would divide the country."
• “I don’t need any lessons in legitimacy from Harper.”
• “He knows where to find me.”
• "He's creating a parliamentary crisis and dividing the country."
• "It’s his budget, not mine."
• "It's up to Harper to make the right decision and up to me to decide if he made it."
• "We're putting the government on probation."
•"Mr. Harper, your time is up.”
*"This is a prime minister who a year ago was trying to make you embarrassed if you liked opera or classical music or the ballet or poetry. I mean, come on, let's get over this. You can like hockey, you can like classical music. Let's stop playing Canadian against Canadian and taste against taste."

The Susan Delacarte Stephen Harper Attack Thesaurus (Under Construction)