The Secret Diary of Stephen Harper: Former NDPer Elected

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Former NDPer Elected

I'm sorry to announce that the oleagenous Bobama Rae, whose brother John lent him $700,000 to run for the Puffin leadership, has been elected to the House of Commons.

This is good news for the people of Toronto, who have sent Rae packing on several occasions, but this is not good news for viewers of Question Period, who will now be treated to endless sanctimonious meandering, and all with a straight face, set with predictable outrage.

I wonder if he will have anything new to say on "CadScam" and "NAFTAgate", two phony scandals that are well past their due date? I cannot comment further on matters that are before the courts.

Talk Tough Like Mike

•“Look, this is America and you have to decide what kind of country you want. This is your country as much as it is mine.” - 2004
*"Look, if I lose, I'll just move back to Massachusetts." - to the Harvard Crimson newspaper - 2006
*“If you mess with me, I’ll mess with you until I’m done.”
• "You're looking at someone who turned down the chance to become Prime Minister of Canada, and I did so, in part, because I felt it would divide the country."
• “I don’t need any lessons in legitimacy from Harper.”
• “He knows where to find me.”
• "He's creating a parliamentary crisis and dividing the country."
• "It’s his budget, not mine."
• "It's up to Harper to make the right decision and up to me to decide if he made it."
• "We're putting the government on probation."
•"Mr. Harper, your time is up.”
*"This is a prime minister who a year ago was trying to make you embarrassed if you liked opera or classical music or the ballet or poetry. I mean, come on, let's get over this. You can like hockey, you can like classical music. Let's stop playing Canadian against Canadian and taste against taste."

The Susan Delacarte Stephen Harper Attack Thesaurus (Under Construction)