The Secret Diary of Stephen Harper: Pretty Predictable, But Better Than Botoxed Biden

Friday, October 3, 2008

Pretty Predictable, But Better Than Botoxed Biden

As you know, I'm not a big fan of these gang-ups. I would have preferred a pool party gala at 24 Sussex, but at least we were around a table instead of at the podium, and it was kind of cool that Jack went after Stéphane, which saved me the trouble. Must have been all the political love I sent his way during the French debate.

Here's Stéphane during the pre-debate photo op, boring Jack and I with more details about his Carbon Shaft.

Wow that Liz May sure is a breath of fresh air, eh? What a feisty scrapper. I think I'll offer her a Senate seat. I mean, that's the only way to keep her out of trouble, right? (And out of the House of Commons? - Ed)

I suggested to Guy that if she toned down her rhetoric a touch, maybe we could bring Liz into Cabinet, and move John Baird over to Foreign Affairs, and Peter to Finance. Guy scoffed and said it would be a mistake - she would try to take over the Senate, and she wouldn't last a week in Cabinet.

Gilles, another great performance, and you nearly had me on the ropes a couple of times. A-

Pix: Chris Wattie, Reuters

Talk Tough Like Mike

•“Look, this is America and you have to decide what kind of country you want. This is your country as much as it is mine.” - 2004
*"Look, if I lose, I'll just move back to Massachusetts." - to the Harvard Crimson newspaper - 2006
*“If you mess with me, I’ll mess with you until I’m done.”
• "You're looking at someone who turned down the chance to become Prime Minister of Canada, and I did so, in part, because I felt it would divide the country."
• “I don’t need any lessons in legitimacy from Harper.”
• “He knows where to find me.”
• "He's creating a parliamentary crisis and dividing the country."
• "It’s his budget, not mine."
• "It's up to Harper to make the right decision and up to me to decide if he made it."
• "We're putting the government on probation."
•"Mr. Harper, your time is up.”
*"This is a prime minister who a year ago was trying to make you embarrassed if you liked opera or classical music or the ballet or poetry. I mean, come on, let's get over this. You can like hockey, you can like classical music. Let's stop playing Canadian against Canadian and taste against taste."

The Susan Delacarte Stephen Harper Attack Thesaurus (Under Construction)