Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Top Ten Reasons Why Stéphane Dion Can't be Prime Minister

1. Was caught trying to inject human growth hormone into his campaign.
2. Just can't compete with Paul Szabo in the looks department.
3. He'd rather work on unveiling a new line of Clarity Eyeglasses.
4. That bastard Nik Nanos has it in for him.
5. Even John Turner told him, "it's over."
6. Wanted to forge an alliance with the Canadian Alliance, but found out they were no longer a party.
7. Had to cancel tomorrow's appearance at Question Period so he didn't miss "House".
8. Blew half the Liberal war chest playing internet poker.
9. Recently told a Toronto campaign worker, "Keep that ugly baby away from me."
10. The Party nixed his scheme to bring in a carbon tax and give everybody a free hybrid in exchange. Now when he tells Kyoto to "sit'', the dog lies down.