The Secret Diary of Stephen Harper: Bear Headed Truth

Friday, November 30, 2007

Bear Headed Truth

Gripping testimony old fellow. Now that you have cleared the name of yours truly, perhaps you can educate the Ethics Committee about how and why members of the late Regressive Conservative Party were so bad at handling lobbyists like yourself compared to how the slick members of the Naturist Governing Party retained your services, insisting on the use of some of Canada's more respected law firms.

I can only conclude we should do what the Americans do, and give every retiring Prime Minister a library for his or her papers and a couple of million bucks for their memoirs.

Pix: Adulation from Pat Martin; Shaun Best/Reuters

Talk Tough Like Mike

•“Look, this is America and you have to decide what kind of country you want. This is your country as much as it is mine.” - 2004
*"Look, if I lose, I'll just move back to Massachusetts." - to the Harvard Crimson newspaper - 2006
*“If you mess with me, I’ll mess with you until I’m done.”
• "You're looking at someone who turned down the chance to become Prime Minister of Canada, and I did so, in part, because I felt it would divide the country."
• “I don’t need any lessons in legitimacy from Harper.”
• “He knows where to find me.”
• "He's creating a parliamentary crisis and dividing the country."
• "It’s his budget, not mine."
• "It's up to Harper to make the right decision and up to me to decide if he made it."
• "We're putting the government on probation."
•"Mr. Harper, your time is up.”
*"This is a prime minister who a year ago was trying to make you embarrassed if you liked opera or classical music or the ballet or poetry. I mean, come on, let's get over this. You can like hockey, you can like classical music. Let's stop playing Canadian against Canadian and taste against taste."

The Susan Delacarte Stephen Harper Attack Thesaurus (Under Construction)